Most likely your iPhone's video uses the HEVC H.265 codec, which is not supported in Premiere Elements 13.
(Your operating system may also be relevant, although you don't mention what it is.)
To confirm this open your video in the free download MediaInfo. In MediaInfo, set View to Text and then copy and paste the report it displays to this forum.
That is probably it. So is it upgrade time or do I use a product like Handbrake to convert it? Oh and running Windows 10.
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So is it upgrade time or do I use a product like Handbrake to convert it?
Well, Handbrake is free, but you can download the trial of Premiere Elements 2019 and see which you like better.