Media Encoder takes foerever to connect to AE by dynamic link and render h264

Media Encoder is taking forever to render after effects h264 video and to connect via dynamic link, the blue loading screen takes a pianfull giant amount of time to finish, when video rendering starts it's fast, but it's almost impossible to start render, sometimes the software takes forever to start dynamic link and it basically crashes and forces me do start to software all over again.

this didn't use to happen at all, but now this software is almost impossible to use

Here's my specs:

OS: Windows 10

AE version: 18.4.1 Build 4
ME version: 15.4.1Build 5
RAM: 32GB DDR4
CPU: Ryzen 1800x
GPU: Nvidia 1070 ti
Cache Disc: Kingston 120GB SSD