OS X (Unix) Kindergarten for Adobe Developers

Anyone who has had the displeasure of viewing flash media on a Mac or Linux machine and seen their CPU almost suffer a coronary failure will understand the following. The many threads on the subject of Flash Player consuming 90% CPU (OS X) attest to the abject misery using Adobe software on unix-based machines. I have a MacIntel so I empathise wholeheartedly with the Flash plugin wretchedness. But it's not limited to the Adobe Flash Player either. The same is true of any Adobe software on the Mac. Whether it's Photoshop, Flash Pro or any other myriad Adobe software, their (unix-based) Mac versions are ALWAYS resource hogs.

Adobe are woeful at porting their software for unix-based systems, especially OS X.  You can imagine the popping of the champagne cork as the developers complete their testing.

Together:                "Hip, hip, hooray! For we're all jolly good fellows, for we're - "

Developer 1:           "- Wait a minute. I can't help feel we're forgetting something....Any ideas?"

(Rest of developers murmur)    

Developer 2:               "Oh, pish. We've forgotten about Unix."

Developer 3:               "About what?"

Developer 2:               "You know, Unix. Linux, Unix and OS X. We don't have a version for those"

Developer 1:               "What do we usually do?"

Developer 2:               "Well, not very much"

Developer 1:               "You mean nothing at all"

Developer 2:               "mm...Yes"

(Celebrating resumes)   

Developer 1:               "No, we have to release something or else we appear a one-trick pony"

Developer 3:               "But, but think of the cost. Besides, we don't have the skills"

Developer 2:               "Should we buy in the skills?"

(Laughter erupts)

Developer 3:               "Good one."

Developer 1:               "Yes, but what do we do?"

(Choral murmur)

Developer 2:               "Hang on. Look! What's this button? 'U-n-i-x Export'"

(Group silence)

Developer 3:               "What do you think will happen if we press it? Are we allowed to press it?"

(Momentum builds)

Together:                     "Press it!...Press it!"

Developer 1:               "OK, arrange a press release. Tell them we're multi-platform. (Gulp)...Guys, hold onto your hats..."

(Sparks fly)