How would I make this PDF accessible?

I tested the document with NVDA and the document reads as expected. What do you consider "Funny"? and what screen reader are you listening to the document in? 

Here are a few things to note:

1. Your alt-text is going to have the word "Graphic" every other sentence or so because it informs the user they are still inside the description of the image. 

2. If you are reading it with Adobe Read Aloud, you are not going to get the results you are hoping for. Read Aloud is a text-to-speech tool and not recommended or considered assistive technology by most AT users. However if you want it to be read by Read Aloud you are going to need modify how your "Figures" are tagged. Right now there are paths but also live Text. Read Aloud will try to read the text inside the Figure even though it shouldn't. So you should tag the live text as figures or convert them to outlines in your source. Otherwise Read Aloud is going to try to do more than it should and mix up all your live text inside the figures.

I have tagged your first section to show you what I mean. I am sure you can get the idea based on what has been done. BTW.. the logo wasn't tagged but is now. Let me know if you have other issues.