Why can't my computer just talk to me!

[Cactus Cowboy]

Read this, read that, text here, text there, text everywhere! Why can't my computer just talk to me? I tickle it's keys, I dust it off, I hug it before I go to bed, I replace it's innards when it's not feeling well, the least it could do is TALK TO ME!

[John T Smith]

Here you go Free Text to Speech Online with Natural Voices

Disclaimer... found via Google, so NO personal experience

[gener7]

https://forums.adobe.com/people/Cactus+Cowboy  wrote

Read this, read that, text here, text there, text everywhere! Why can't my computer just talk to me? I tickle it's keys, I dust it off, I hug it before I go to bed, I replace it's innards when it's not feeling well, the least it could do is TALK TO ME!

CC, I'll need a degree in psychiatry, an office with a couch, a few notebooks, and $150 an hour before I say anything.

Gene

[Trevor.Dennis]

I expect it can.  I remember being impressed with my brothers Google Pixel phone that he constantly spoke to and got spoken answers.  Then I discovered that any old smart phone can do that.  In fact my old iPhone 5S does an amazing job of recognizing my vaguely east London accent getting my spoken questions word perfect almost every time.

It seems likely that computers can do the same thing via webcams etc.  I don't have a microphone icon on Google, but that is probably because the webcam is not connected.  If you do have a mic and see its icon on a Google search page, then try clicking and talking to it.

Just checked Chrome, which does have the mic icon

[gener7]

I kind of get Cactus Cowboy's drift, but it's hard enough to find Computer Repair let alone Computer Counseling.

It would probably be a boffo idea for a startup.

[Ussnorway]

https://forums.adobe.com/people/Cactus+Cowboy  wrote

I hug it before I go to bed

they have a doll for that now

[Chuck Uebele]

"Computer... Computer... Hello Computer... Keyboard, how quaint."

[Trevor.Dennis]

Where will it end though?

"Hey computer.  Will you Photoshop these pictures while I go grab a coffee?"

"I'm sorry Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that"

[Cactus Cowboy]

"Computer... Computer... Hello Computer... Keyboard, how quaint."

Star Trek, The Journey Home. I thought that very line Chuck...excellent!

[Trevor.Dennis]

I suppose it would be unrealistic to have expected his fingers to blur at astonishing speed seeing as he a) apparently never had the need to practice with a keyboard, and b) is 'of an age', even if they had miracle cures for the ails that come with age in 2286.  I guess they could have rationalized the fact that they still looked so old, by claiming them to be well in to their second centuries.

I couldn't help myself, and had to look for a date for the original series. Various Trekkie nerd sites made Kirk 35 years old in 2265, so if anything, they have aged faster in that future than in the real world in our time.

[arctarus]

If computers could talk the only thing they would want to talk about is numbers. Have you ever seen how computers think? It's really annoying, and they're total nerds. What kind of dork insists so irrationally that you translate everything from binary to normal talk just to speak with them? Not to mention the fact you have to translate it back just to get a word in edgewise.

Frankly I'm glad computers can't talk. If computers could talk then what's next? The mice? That's actual mice by the way, not lame computer mice which, by the way, cannot even complete a maze. Disgraceful.

                                                                                                                                                                                       - Ricky Thomas