brush select boarder looking different

no, same effect just darker or lighter

Looks like you have two different Color Themes.

In Photoshop go to Edit>Preferences>Interface>Color Theme and see if one of the choices is right.

dosent seem like it. the brushes are how they are meant to be and work fine. Its just the cosmetic aesthetic oc the boxes around them that irritates me

its a small thing. I know. but i want it too look like the left one but now i somehow got the right one

Maybe the Brush Settings got changed somehow.

(Window>Brush settings)

The bottom one looks like Opacity Jitter with Pen Pressure in the Transfer settings.

26.0 (both from the same version) one day it just changed. i reverted back to older versions as well but to no avail

What version of Photoshop and Windows are you using?

Are those screenshots from two different Photoshop versions?